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BuildingSelf24
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Anger Triggers
I’ve discovered that I get angry when I need to do something because admitting needs automatically means failure in my mind. It’s virtually impossible not to need something. From food to sleep to money, living requires things to survive. Needs just mean that I’m still alive which is pretty good because I can’t desire anything when I’m dead or numb or dead inside. So needing things doesn’t mean I’m failure but that I’m winning actually for still being alive.Obligations are another trigger. I think this comes from the trauma of the sexual assaults and growing up in a house where I was physically forced to do things. I had any situation where it feels like my hands are tied and I have to do something. I think I have to switch my thinking about this since not all obligations are like that. Some are enjoyable like taking care of children or just things you do to contribute in a functioning society like taxes although the US tax code could use some work. Obligations don’t always imply abuse